There comes a time in your life when you have to make a decision that is bigger than any decisions you’ve ever made in your whole entire life.
2008 was the start of a new life for me. I enrolled myself in UiTM for ASASI TESL and it was crazy because I didn’t even know what TESL was until I applied for it. It was a nerve wrecking experience for me because I have never been away from my family alone before. I never stayed in a boarding school, so the experience of coming over from Kuching to Shah Alam was something huge for me – and I was alone, and lonely.
I remember the very last moment hugging my Mummy goodbye. She cried, I cried and as I closed the door to my room, I went to my bunk bed and cried and sobbed like a baby. If anyone were to see me, they’d laugh. I called my mum on the phone that first night of being away from my family sobbing and crying. I was alone. I was afraid. I was confused.
But things got better the next day. I met my course-mates and the first person I talked to was Bonnie. Then I met Kei. He told me he wanted to be an ambassador and he spoke with this fancy British accent. In my head I was like,
“Oh God. My English must have sounded lame to him.”
Then the next person who stood out to me was Zach because he was white and I was like,
“I’m never gonna ever survive this.”
After the first day of orientation at the faculty ended, Bonnie told me that I was staying at the wrong college, so he took me to Meranti and that was where I stayed – in his room- and I met Sharil. We hit it off instantly and we talked about Gossip Girls, Desperate Housewives and listened to Leona Lewis at night – and then he left, after 2 weeks (BASTARD, LOL). Anyways, cutting the story short…
Turns out, life had/has different plans for me throughout my years in uni. The times I had spent being away from my family are/were the times that I had learned most about myself. Never in my wildest imaginations would I have imagined my life would turn out the way it has turned out now and then. I never thought I would be a student leader, or a class-rep for most of my degree years, and never would I thought I’d be one of those students who stood out. I remember telling myself before I continued my studies that all I wanted to do was be unknown and just go through uni life unseen, unheard and unspoken of – that didn’t happen.
I’ve met some wonderful (and despicable) people being away from my family. The characters I’ve met are something that I would remember for the rest of my life. If I were to stay in Kuching and continued my studies there, I don’t think I would meet so, so, so, so many wonderful characters. My friends that I am close to now are a blessing to me (you guys know who you guys are) and I think it’s one of the ways God is showing me that He is with me. I’ve experienced relationships while being here. Those cheesy lines and scenes from books I read and movies I watched, yeah experienced them first-hand here in Shah Alam.
After finishing my uni days, I told myself I wanted to work in Kuala Lumpur until at least I hit 30. But hey, life has a different turn like I said. I’m not even 25 yet and I am moving back to my hometown already.
Now I’ll be leaving Shah Alam crying instead of smiling. It’s funny how 6 years ago I arrived here with the feeling of dread because I left home – the place I know so well. 6 years later, I am feeling dreadful because I will be leaving a place I HAVE been calling home, the place where I played, and the place where I truly grew up – Shah Alam. I was sheltered when I was in Kuching. In Shah Alam I am free to be whoever I want to be, and that freedom has given me a whole different view of the world and the people I have met in my life.
I’m just going to miss everything.
Dya asked me if I was feeling sad leaving all the memories I had in Shah Alam. I am not leaving those memories. I’ll bring them wherever I go.
p.s: Still wishing for a Pintu Suka-Hati.